18 thoughts on “Decidedly Deeks & The Pain of Post Traumatic Stress by Phillydi

  1. Laura

    This was a terrific blog, phillydi, you said everything so well, and helped relieve a lot of the frustration I was feeling from Ascension. I actually didn’t think the teeth jokes were that bad especially when I caught the deep and meaningful looks between Sam and Deeks which spoke much louder than words, as did the look between the two of them in the ER, where I felt Deeks received support from Sam that he badly needed.

    The preview for next week where obviously Kensi has gone out on a group date with Nell and Rose seems to show a degree of callousness to Deek’s plight in Kensi that is sad and not just to Densi shippers, but to anyone who thinks about their partnership. If indeed 4 months has passed and Nate is only now getting involved, that is actually incredibly cruel of Hetty and NCIS. Bates should be very angry that NCIS allowed this to happen to Deeks. It doesn’t seem reasonable that such a valuable human asset would be allowed to languish like that either.

    On the Densi side of things, this relationship has laid so fallow now, I don’t see how it can ever flourish again. Sometimes I can really tell that men mostly write this show, honestly.

    Again, kudos on your really great writing above. It was one the most informative articles I’ve read and the way you tied the facts into the show really taught me so much.

  2. Evi

    Phillydi, what a great article and point of view. Thank you for enlightning us on PTSD.

    Seeing Deeks turning into this whole new character will be extremely challenging and heartbreaking. I am really curious how every single member of the team has tried to help him.

    I absolutely love Deeks, but unfortunately it will take a while to get him back in his old self.

  3. Erin

    Nicely Done! Deeks has a very long road in front of him for sure and I think Sam will turn out to be a somewhat unlikely ally.

  4. mistri

    Excellent blog. Only one little quibble–the idea that cops are not aware of man’s inhumanity towards man. Trust me, from personal experience, first responders and detectives, especially, are well aware of that and learn to cope with it almost from day one. If they didn’t, I doubt any police officer would be able to perform their duties day in and day out.
    Just one case of severe child abuse, and the weak would not be able to survive.

    I agree with what you think Nate will do to help Deeks (and Sam) to overcome this trauma. Deeks has more strength than he realizes and it will just take time before he recovers. I’m so glad that the writers are taking the time to play through this and do it right.

    I’ve had a bit of experience with PTSD dealing with the aftermath of a few catastrophes. I suppose in some sense I’ve experienced it but in no way did it ever impede my performance (except for maybe botching a couple of diagrams on vehiculars–long story that I won’t bore anyone with). However, my SO suffered with it for quite a while after the Hyatt Regency collapse so I’m familiar with it. He had nightmares you wouldn’t believe about drowning in rivers of blood.

    You’ve pretty much nailed it.

    1. Phillydi

      Thanks Mistri! Just to explain myself a little more….I agree most first responders wouldn’t do what they do unless they cared about their fellow human being. I was pointing fingers only at Sam and Callen who may have become jaded after all they have been through certainly much more than the average cop like Deeks. They tend to pick themselves up quicker and move on (from what I can see) unlike Deeks who is struggling to understand what happen. I think it’s the first time he’s been faced with such resistance as to what he does in fact so much so he wants to quit. He still wants to know that what he does makes a difference but now he’s not so sure anymore. Callen and Sam may have come to that part of their career a long time ago and were able to get past that and learned how to compartmentalize it all and go on with life. The question is if Deeks will be able to do the same but keep the caring side of his personality. I’d hate to see him lose that big heart of his.

      Thanks to all for your great comments too!

      1. Carrie

        Also I think for Deeks, he was debased by Sam just before this all happened. His very character was questioned because of a hair cut choice etc… and so it would bring to light all his faults as past experiences of being razzed by the team would probably run through his head. And then he gets tortured to protect another person because that is what he does, except that person just told him he wasn’t worth his weight in salt.

        I hope Sam and Deeks are able to have another chat later as a simple apology now seems so lacking…

  5. LR

    So let me get this straight. Deeks has been suffering for four months, and Kensi is going group dating? With Nell? Wow…..just when I didn’t think her cold-heartedness could get any worse. And she’s giving great lessons to Nell also. Kudos Kensi. Your form of support for someone you supposedly have feelings for really leaves a lot to be desired. Granger showed more affection toward Sam. And Hetty’s comments next week really disappointed me. Of all people, I never thought she could say that. Where has this team been for four months? I can see why Deeks is going to LAPD….if rumors are correct. Really not enjoying where the writers are taking this season so far. But they know they have us glued to our TVs!! Hope it gets better.

      1. LR

        Thanks Laura!! I re-watched all the seasons over the summer. It’s funny all the things I noticed with the knowledge through the end of season 4. The loyalty Deeks has shown this team has never wavered for sure. Though the previews may be misleading and we need to see all to know for sure, it seems to me that the consistency is not there for the whole team. All we can do is see what happens. Enjoy!!

  6. Karen

    Thanks for a really great article, Philly Di. The way you wove the facts about PTSD into the show’s plot was very interesting. I certainly hope Deeks gets support not just from Nate, but from the whole team. And I know Sam has lots of training and experience, but I don’t see how he could come out of that experience unscathed either. I also think Kensi has a lot to make up for from last week. She is at risk of turning me against her if she doesn’t start taking better care of her partner. Your article and the comments really make me think about what it’s like for all the military and first responders out there who deal with such trauma. I hope the show can do justice to what it’s really like.

  7. Lumy_Mee

    The previews are taken out of the context of the whole episode. I am sure that when we see the whole of it, we will put them in the right place. I do not believe Deeks was forgotten for 4 months before Hetty calls Nate. Things most likely happened, he probably rejected any interraction with the team – we don’t know yet what attempts had been made to comfort him. In the latest preview Kensi says something about rejection, and I don’t think she refers to dating… and the 3 (vs 4) referrence is also telling. Deeks being away and refusing to connect back is a burden to most of them – and they will all need Nate to help heal together, because it was not just Sam and Deeks who went through trauma, it was the trauma and drama of the entire team. I see Nate’s mission as one to show them how to cope together, and not each on his own.

  8. Andieke

    Or maybe Kensi’s been there all of the way, without succes trying to get through to him and just needed a break ( or that’ what I’m hoping)

    We don’t know yet what happened in those four months, and even when I believe it’s been too long, they might have tried a lot of things.

    Besides I don’t think Hetty will let Deeks go that easily, but can she be blamed for making sure he’s fully recovered? In the end they put their lives in each other’s hands and you want to be sure he’ll be there 100%

    Anyway, basically can’t wait till the next episode and see what’s gonna happen. More then often the previews have indeed been pulled out of context, so I do believe it won’t be that bad.

  9. Evi

    I agree with Lumy and Andieke. Maybe Kensi has repeatedly tried to help it out of this nightmare but he has rejected her help. No matter how cold, distant and professional she is I find it hard to believe she would abandon Deeks right now when he deep inside he needs her the most.

    Again, although Kensi has the reputation of having this huge wall around her and doesn’t let anyone in, I think Deek’s wall is even higher. Especially now.

  10. Gayle

    Diane – Great job painting the picture of the impacts of PTSD. Personally, I look forward to the show making this a long-term storyline for this season. The acting opportunities this will provide ECO could potentially/likely present phenomenal performances.

    I agree with others that there’s no way to know at this point what has happened and with whom over the past 4 months – how each member of the team has reacted, who has made efforts toward Deeks and how, if Deeks completely withdrew or not, etc. I can’t imagine Kensi just left him to his own devices, even if that’s what he asked for. (If so, stay tuned for an upcoming rant from this viewer!)

    I’ve look more forward to 5×2 than 5×1 mostly because all the teasers gave so much away this summer. Mostly I want to see how Deeks deals and how Nate will intervene. (Honestly, I wish Nate was going to be on a couple more episodes in this role.)

    Remember people, it’s a marathon, not a sprint.

  11. Callen37

    As someone who’s husband has PTSD and lives with the effects day to day I am pleased that the show is touching on this. I hope that this is handled sensitively and that unlike some other shows that have touched on this it won’t be a ‘Ok you’ve had therapy now you’re better’ kinda thing. I do feel if anyone can do this justice it’s going to be ECO. Really looking forward to the next episode and to see how this goes.

  12. Tara

    I agree with everyone else who said we need to watch the entire episode before we make any judgments on how Deeks PTSD is being handled. I never put much stock in previews. I just watch them because your only given 30 seconds of an hour long episode. As for what Hetty said, I’m hoping that she is referring to the fact that if Deeks doesn’t get the help he needs, he could be a danger to himself, and anyone around him. As for Kensi, if anyone knows what PTSD can do to someone, it’s her. She was engaged to a man who suffered from it. So let’s hope the writers actually have Deeks lean on Kensi through this difficult time. I’ll keep my fingers loosely crossed:)

  13. Dianne

    Great post Diane! I know it’s late but I promise myself that I will read this post and comment on it. I really care about what will happen to Deeks. I’m hurt for him and I’m afraid for him.

    In my opinion, I think Deeks is a ticking bomb. It’s only a matter of time before he explodes because keeping things to himself which is understandable. Who would want to relive the time of torture? Nobody, even me but we all know how critical it is that a person face it no matter how hard.

    I believe Deeks will get through this but it will take a very long time and it will affect all the people in his life.

    I think it’s going to affect his judgement to trust other people, his perspectives and decision making, he’ll also develop a hyper vigilant behavior.

    The scene where he fell asleep with Kensi by his side is touching and really took my breath away, but I’m also worried. He might push people who cares for him because of what he’s been through.

    He will still be capable of smiling and making jokes but he might lose for a while his sense of humor. I imagine him being stress all the time, and watching out for everyone and anyone who might be out to get him.

    Time will come that Deeks will hit rock bottom and then something good will happen but the journey will be challenging and very painful for him. I don’t wish it but it seem like it.

    I hope Kensi will do her best to get through him and help him too. She can’t give up him even if Deeks will be absent as her partner for a while. She can’t treat him like the way he used to but she also can’t coddle him too much. It would be detrimental to his psyche. I think Deeks don’t want people to pity him but I also think Deeks don’t want them not to care. Which brings us back to the part that he really needs to deal with what happen to him, to acknowledge what he’s been through, and for him to learn new coping mechanisms, and be able to live his life in a optimum level of functioning.

    When I work in the hospital I remember from people who’s been through something worst, they will never go back a hundred percent to the people they used to be, what they really need to do is learn to live life accepting what they’ve been through, learn new coping mechanisms and live their live with their new and improved self while maintaining a semblance of control, empathy, humanity, enthusiasm and still live his life with a thirst to learn and live life a better way, and to help other people at the same time.

    Deeks got through something worst, he did it before when he barely had anyone, he will do it again. And the best part is he’s got friends he consider his family looking out for him. What he’s gone through is different but the debilitating effects is almost the same.

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