I dare you.

I dare you to find G Callen laughing.

His undercover aliases may be free to laugh, but, for some reason, Callen, as himself, chooses not to.

Yes, he has other means of showing amusement.

There’s The Smirk. (Oh, Team Callen loves The Smirk. And, yes. The Smirk gets capitalized, because it’s like its own thing. So quirky and hott, The Smirk is. Maybe one day The Smirk will get its own post. Should we vote on that?)

Then, there’s the disbelieving scoff. The one that happens with an exhale of disgusted air and a turning of the head to the side. Yeah, that’s the one.

There’s also a quiet snort.
A simple “Ha!” (Usually to prove a point.)
A raised eyebrow.
And, my favorite: the sparkling, blue eyes that tease on top of a straight poker face, showing an inward amusement that can only be contained by Callen, himself. (You know the look.)

To my knowledge, the only true laugh that has come from Special Agent Callen was due to Hetty telling Sam she was getting him home in time for Christmas and Sam proceeding to jubilantly pick up Ms. Henrietta Lange. All masterful, petite, graceful, enigmatic four feet of her.

G laughed.

And that? That reaction was a real, genuine, G Callen laugh.

Besides that? Nada.

Prove me wrong.

Or, tell me why you think he doesn’t laugh.

#CallenLaugh

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The words flow easily from his mouth when he’s in a sticky situation.

Explanations.
Fabrications.
Truths reimagined for the greater good.

The deadlier the situation, the heavier the weight of his words.

It’s silky, listening to them, watching the way he can talk himself through almost any situation in the world, save one…

His coworkers/ friends/ surrogate family.

Ever noticed that when it comes to them, and them alone, he has a tendency to keep his mouth shut?

Sure. The occasional barb thrown about a burrito, a comment about tea, a question to gain deeper insight to his team, but on the norm, Callen is watching, calculating, in short, being silent. Stonewalling.

Where the heck did this come from?

Deeks has no problem with words, and, as #TeamDeeks knows, sometimes he has an issue turning them off.
Sam is the ever-present partial-guru of wisdom spoken on the layman’s level. Always quits while he’s ahead. (Or, once he’s achieved “ahead” status.)
Kensi doesn’t hesitate to share her thoughts, only rarely having to backtrack.

So, what’s up with our Team Leader? What is going on in that fuzzy head that brings about the need to stop speaking?

Pick three episodes at random. Odds are, there will be examples of Callen holding his peace in at least two of them.

I picked “Chinatown” from Season One, “Black Widow” from Season Two, and “Backstopped” from Season Three. Not delving in as deep as I normally would, here are the few that peeked out at me.

“Chinatown” – Callen stays silent after Sam tells him he does things, breaks things, but doesn’t dabble. Perfect place for a retort, in my book.

“Black Widow” – Easiest mention is how Callen confidently kills the last remaining shooter: silently. But, there’s also the touching scene when Sam goes protective on G and tells him, “I know this is the only way, but it doesn’t mean I gotta like it.” G’s response? You guessed it.

“Backstopped” – Besides the carsick moments where it’s obvious Callen would rather not be speaking, there’s silence with Kensi whenever she’s trying to get to know him. (His reasoning made sense to her in the end, but it was stonewalling, so I’m counting it.)

Three out of three episodes.

Apparently, to G Callen, silence is golden. Or, stonewalling is essential. Or, keeping your mouth shut makes you look wise.

Or, at least, it keeps one out of a lot of messes…

Yeah, we’ll go with that.

#CallenSilence

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There are hints that we learn something big about Callen in Season 5… So. Here’s the big question:

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Vote, and the winning answer will receive a future Callen’s Corner post dedicated to exploring all its glory.

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All teenagers in the US do it. In fact, if you see a teenager anywhere who isn’t doing it, you might want to snap a quick picture, because it’s infecting them all at an alarming rate.

You guessed it: staring at their cell phones as if it is telling them the secrets to the Universe.

Guess who else does it occasionally?

G Callen.

So it begs the question that many a good fan are wondering: what is he looking at???

Is he texting? Some ask.

Studying cases. Some say.

Reading the news!
Watching stocks?
Finishing that Russian book on a phone reader.
Browsing the World Wide Web.

Good grief, the list is endless! Really there is no telling what is so interesting on his phone. All we truly know is that he has to go into multitasking mode whenever he does it, half listening to his peers, half using his cell phone. (He gets that look on his face that simply falls under “multitasking.” Like the times he’s trying to figure out flashbacks while listening to a person talk… I always thought it was rude of that person for not halting their blabbing so he could finish his flashback in peace. Alas, another rant for another post.)

Here’s the GOOD news.

We can pretty well guess what ISN’T on that cell phone screen.

1. He is NOT checking Facebook. Callen doesn’t do The FB. (And he thinks we’re idiots for doing it.)
2. He’s not watching YouTube. If he needs to know about something on YouTube, he’s certain Eric and Nell will tell him about it. (Of course he knows that Hetty occasionally browses YouTube. It was his first sign that she was human and not some super spy soldier woman hatched in a lab.)
3. He’s not planning dinner. It’s L.A.; lots of places to eat out.
4. He’s not checking on the video cameras that guard Ops.
5. He isn’t logging a tally of who wins arguments on his Team. (He wins all of them, anyway.)
6. He is NOT doing any sort of mathematics.
7. He’s not Googling Lady Gaga. Again, if he needs to know, someone will tell him. (No one keeps up with The Gaga like Hetty.)
8. He’s not finding e-mails that stump him, since nothing stumps him. Ever. EVER.
9. He is definitely NOT trying to find a way to take over the world. (Even though he could, and all of us think he should.)

What do YOU think?

#CallensCellPhone

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Callen reminisces…

Before there was Sam.
“I miss those days.” Callen lies.

Their first mission together.
“I went in first!” Callen protests.

Sam being there when he thought he was dead.
“G!!!” Sam’s voice echoes around Callen. “Stay with me!!”

Sam being maternal.
“Sam, how many times do we have to go over this?” Callen warns. “You are my partner, not my mother.”

Sam letting him crash at his place.
Sam being there when he learned about Alina, Amy, and Clara.
Sam being forgiving even when he let him down with Moe.
Sam putting up with his attitude.

Sam saving his behind.
“You’re like the lone wolf until your butt’s on the line,” Sam scoffs, “and then you expect me to come to your rescue.”

Sam throwing him under the bus.
“No donut, no love.” Sam says, matter-of-fact.

Partners for five years and more.

“We’ve been together for longer than most married couples in this city.” Callen says with an amused look on his face.

Callen reminisces and always realizes:
He’s at his best with the Big Guy at his side.

#CallenandSam

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